07 Jul 2020


And I wonder - why did Facebook blow up from something as simple as a naked body? A naked body with no “interesting” parts exposed - just the idea of a naked body - nothing there to see that you haven't seen elsewhere. Nothing any one of you doesn't already have... nothing, except maybe for the idea of freedom... The idea of doing something that you're not sure you are supposed to be doing. Making a choice. Taking a step. Making a statement. And after all, why not? Do you have the courage?

Where are the borders? What's your limit?
I grew up in Soviet times. I remember the regime finally falling when I was 12 years old. So I got to see both extremes - extreme freedom and extreme lack of it. I remember an extreme lack of consumerism and also the extreme boom of consumerism. The denial of religion and its resurgence.
I think all these extremes made me immune to any imposed restrictions, but they also gave me the need to define my own limits, to judge good from evil, to discern what is appropriate and what is not on a moral foundation.

Today, there are many contradictions in our societal norms. And I fear this got people confused about what freedom is. People's perception of what is appropriate, of what is normal got warped. On one hand we fight for the acceptance of some things that were considered not acceptable - gay marriages, transsexuality, restrictions on parential abuse and so on. But on the other hand, the female body is becoming less appropriate to expose; accepting your own sexuality is sometimes seen as not welcome, as shallow or politically incorrect. I think we are a bit lost in all the nuances of what represents freedom and what passes as correct... and it takes a lot of courage to make a statement that is truly yours and own it in front of the world. 

My nude project was, in a way, the declaration of my own borders and my statement of freedom. It defined the borders of what I am trying to find in my self and my own inner measure. Some think it was courageous; maybe it was.
Though now, being 40 and confident, being courageous is easy.

But it did take a lot of courage back when I was in my early 20s and I hated my body. So, to overcome this I went to a tantra retreat... Here, people hung out on nudist beaches. By the way, imagining that a tantra retreat is about sex is more or less like non-tango people thinking that Tango is all about passion and leg kicks. In fact, it was more about yoga, connection, meditation, but it did take courage to do what I did and to make peace with my body.
Now it was more about my own borders and limits. To me, the borders are my taste and my own morality. I think that an intelligent and cultured person has their morality and taste ingrained, from literature, history, religion, art.
Blindly following some absolute rules is the easy way for those not thinking much, for those lacking critical reflection. Arbitrary, absolute rules are necessary for ruling the herd, for directing the lazy minds have no self measure. Take “fashion” for examply, the industry that wants you to consume more and more new products without considering your own style or taste. To make it easy to manipulate, the system wants us to have no judgement, no self balance and as a result, no inner morality or our own measure of good and bad.

Whatever is not forbidden is allowed?
Or is it that whatever is not in the approved guidelines is forbidden? Is whatever's not forbidden ok? But what happens when no one is watching you? Is it why there are so many awful, unimaginably ugly things happening under the covers and behind closed curtains?
In my youth, I often confused the freedom of speech with being rude or inconsiderate, with saying anything that was on my mind and acting with impunity. Later, I learned that the real borders of the intelligent and free mind is having consideration for the other, showing sensitivity, compassion. These are the real premises for boundaries.
Blindly obeying norms is as easy as buying whatever's in fashion or working a fixed salary job or going in depression and victim mentality as a response to quarantine... Other reactions require an open mind, a creative approach and no laziness...
My nude project is finished now; I said what I had to say. I am my body, but I am also much more than that. I am my mind, my experience, my soul, my talent, my feelings, my taste. And I need them all to create a perfect balance.

And what is Tango if not Balance?
Balance between freedom and connection
Between dependence and axis
Between emotion and limits
Between structure and improvisation
Between expression and listening
Between being strong and being vulnerable
Between being your true self and who you want to be
Balance between body, soul, mind, yourself and the other.